A dad’s EHFAR story…

Some moments in life grab hold of you. Sometimes these moments are life-changing, but for the most part they are simply reminders. Reminding us to be well, live life to its fullest, laugh just a little more and love each other.

A moment like this one had struck me in 2001. I was just finishing up my workout at a Health Club in downtown Minneapolis and felt energized with what I had accomplished that day. I was on my way to a better self.

While in the locker room, a man walked up to me and asked, “What does your tattoo mean?”

Having the tattoo for a few years on my shoulder, I was always anxious to tell others my story. The tattoo has a unique “pyramid shaped” symbol with the letters E H F A R underneath. I explained to him that it’s the acronym for EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON, and that it’s a philosophy I live by. I could tell he was pleasantly surprised as he responded with, “Way Cool!”. He went on to tell me that he had never heard of it before and that my explanation had made his day. The man went on his way and I was gleaming with pride. I felt that I may have made a little difference in someone that day.

The very next week at around the same time, I had just finished another workout. While opening up my locker, another man had come over to greet me and extended his hand. This is one of those moments I will never forget.

The soft-spoken man said, “You’re the EHFAR guy. I just want to say thank you.”

After a moment of confusion, I asked, “What do you mean?”

He explained that the week prior, he had overheard my conversation with the man asking me about my tattoo. He went on to share with me how EHFAR had changed him. After the man had overheard my story, he traveled to Rochester, Minnesota to see his son in the hospital. His son was at Mayo Clinic battling cancer and fighting for his life. He said that when he held his son that evening, he told his son that everything happens for a reason, and that there’s a reason for this. He strongly embraced his son and said, “We’re going to get through this.”

After hearing this, I could feel the presence of something amazing and great. After taking a moment to catch my breath, I asked, “How’s your son doing?”

He responded, “He’s still fighting, he’s a strong kid!”

You see, this small moment had actually moved onto another moment, giving a dad and his son a sign of hope. I don’t know where the dad and his son are today, but my sense is that he is where he’s supposed to be, and for a reason.

This was one of the stories that taught me EHFAR is powerful, much more than just an acronym. EHFAR has reach. It reminds us all to take a moment. We can all give people hope by sharing stories just like this one…wouldn’t it be great to hear their story first-hand?

First Published on: November 29, 2007

PEOPLE COME INTO YOUR LIFE FOR A REASON

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season!

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

– Unknown

Sometimes the fate of life drives too fast…

“You feel quiet and overcome by the emotions withheld from in, forget the morel obligation to which you stand for… Nonetheless stand for what you believe. Dream the dream and achieve THE what you deserve. You are one with one so I know the feelings you deal with. I love you, you’re a friend for life, and you’re the bomb!”

– Andy Fields, Principal (Lifelong Friend)

How I met your mother

Kid’s, this is the story of “How I met your mother.”

It was a Friday, and Groundhog’s day in 2001. I spent most of the day in Chicago for work. There was something special in the air. I now know what it was. Traveling in my cab to airport to catch a 5p Flight to Minneapolis I remember having a fun conversation with my best childhood friend, who was gathering with others at my house to greet me. Since it was my birthday weekend, we were going to go out on the town to celebrate. Most of us were single, so that adds another element of excitement to the mix.

I showed up at my house, 20 minutes North of the airport and to my surprise were 5 of my best buddies, big smiles and all, ready to get the evening started and get downtown. I showered, dressed and we were on our way.

Something was still in the air. A 70’s cover band, “Boogie Wonderland” was playing at one of my favorite music venues, “The FineLine” on 1st Avenue in downtown Minneapolis. I remember going to the 2nd floor balcony with the boyz and meeting a few more friends as well. We had about 10 boyz in our group that evening, having a few cocktails, doing whatever it is that boyz do on a Friday night.

I’ve never been afraid, or had a problem with approaching the ladies. I’m sure I’ve made a fool of myself a time or two. I saw 3 nice looking ladies dancing to beat the band near the railing on the 2nd floor. I decided to walk over. I asked the ladies, “Does anyone dance.” One of the ladies, Michelle, grabs her friend, Jessie, and throws her at me. In slow motion, something special “WAS” happening… Jessie launches forward, and about ready to do a face-plant from Michelle’s force, I lunge forward and save her from hitting the floor, and a lifelong of unpleasant dentist visits. We exchanged small talk, re-taught her how to jitterbug and the rest is history and none of your business.

At the end of the evening, the most beautiful woman in the world in slick red pants was giving me her business card. Talk about the use of technology, I emailed her the next Tuesday and mentioned how much of a pleasure it was to meet her. We went out that Friday night and small boutique restaurant, where I later proposed to her, exactly 1 year from the day I met her – Groundhog Day.

What I didn’t know until years later is that they had seen us group of boyz earlier in the evening. Jessie had also noticed me. We laugh about this story today. Yes, it was the fall that sealed the deal in my mind, but really what sealed the deal was having good friends around us. Had our friends not been able to visit and get along that evening, we would not have sealed any deals, nor exchanges of business cards. We were brought together for a reason – through our friends.

So Kid’s, always surround yourself with good people, good friends and you’ll be just fine. And, if a true friend throws you someday, have faith that he/she may be doing it for a reason, and somebody may catch you.

First Published on: July 27, 2008

Think “Outside the Box”

“As many of you know, I believe one has to think “outside the box” and to be different.  Not solely to be different, but to be different with purpose.  Success is not for the majority, if it were, everyone would be successful.” Noel Rahn, Businessman

  • Wherever I see people doing something the way it’s always been done, the way its ‘supposed’ to be done…that’s just a big red flag to me to go look somewhere else.”  Mark Cuban, executive
  •  “Be daring, be different, be impractical, be anything that will assert integrity of purpose and imaginative vision against the play-it-safers, the creatures of the commonplace, the slaves of the ordinary.”  Cecil Beaton, photographer

Welcome to EHFAR®

Share your EHFAR® story(s) and relate with others at EHFAR® Blog. Whether someone (or something) came into your life for a reason at a certain time or you’ve found miraculous strength from +Energy, we invite you to share it. +Energy can be shared in the form of quotes, books, art, music and not limited to form of expression.

As mentioned in the EHFAR® Definition, most who believe “Everything Happens For A Reason” first become aware of the philosophy through:

  • Someone coming into your life for a reason at a certain time
  • Something at a time that seemed horrible, painful and unfair
  • Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness, sheer stupidity
  • A conversation with someone you’ve never talked to before
  • Success and/or downfall(s)
  • Hurt, betrayal or a broken heart
  • Loss of a loved-one
  • Love
  • Awareness, and appreciating every moment
  • Self-Doubt

Get Started is Easy!

You can blog by following these simple steps:

1. Register Online or if you’re already registered go to Login.
2. On your personal dashboard, go to “Write” then “Write Post”.
3. Title your post and add content below.
4. On right-hand side, under “Discussion”, click whether or not you’d like to allow comments or allow pings.
5. Click “Publish”. Submission will be sent for approval.
6. Once approved, Post will be available to be viewed by the world-wide-web, and for people to comment and connect.

ehfar.com is the official destination for people who believe “EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON” and connect with the EHFAR® philosophy.

 

Purpose Driven Life

I too thought this little article was worth the read.

You will enjoy the new insights that Rick Warren has, with his wife now having cancer and him having “wealth” from the book sales. This is an absolutely incredible short interview with Rick Warren, “Purpose Driven Life ” author and pastor of Saddleback Church in California. In the interview by Paul Bradshaw with Rick Warren, Rick said:  People ask me, What is the purpose of life? And I respond: In a nutshell, life is preparation for eternity. We were made to last forever, and God wants us to be with Him in Heaven. 

One day my heart is going to stop, and that will be the end of my body- but not the end of me. I may live 60 to 100 years on earth, but I am going to spend trillions of years in eternity. This is the warm-up act – the dress rehearsal. God wants us to practice on earth what we will do forever in eternity.

We were made by God and for God, and until you figure that out, life isn’t going to make sense. Life is a series of problems: Either you are in one now, you’re just coming out of one, or you’re getting ready to go into another one. The reason for this is that God is more interested in your character than your comfort. God is more interested in making your life holy than He is in making your life happy.  We can be reasonably happy here on earth, but that’s not the goal of life. The goal is to grow in character, in Christ likeness.

This past year has been the greatest year of my life but also the toughest, with my wife, Kay, getting cancer. I used to think that life was hills and valleys – you go through a dark time, then you go to the mountaintop, back and forth. I don’t believe that anymore.  Rather than life being hills and valleys, I believe that it’s kind of like two rails on a railroad track, and at all times you have something  good and something bad in your life.

No matter how good things are in your life, there is always something bad that needs to be worked on. And no matter how bad things are in your life, there is always something good you can thank God for. You can focus on your purposes, or you can focus on your problems. If you focus on your problems, you’re going into self-centeredness,” which is my problem, my issues, my pain.” But one of the easiest ways to get rid of pain is to get your focus off yourself and onto God and others.

We discovered quickly that in spite of the prayers of hundreds of thousands of people, God was not going to heal Kay or make it easy for her.  It has been very difficult for her, and yet God has strengthened her character, given her a ministry of helping other people, given her a testimony, drawn her closer to Him and to people.

You have to learn to deal with both the good and the bad of life. Actually, sometimes learning to deal with the good is harder. For instance, this past year, all of a sudden, when the book sold 15 million copies, it made me instantly very wealthy. It also brought a lot of notoriety that I had never had to deal with before. I don’t think God gives you money or notoriety for your own ego or for you to live a life of ease.

So I began to ask God what He wanted me to do with this money, notoriety and influence. He gave me two different passages that helped me decide what to do, II Corinthians 9 and Psalm 72.

First, in spite of all the money coming in, we would not change our lifestyle one bit. We made no major purchases. Second, about midway through last year, I stopped taking a salary from the church. Third, we set up foundations to fund an initiative we call The Peace Plan to plant churches, equip leaders, assist the poor , care for the sick, and educate the next generation. Fourth, I added up all that the church had paid me in the 24 years since I started the church, and I gave it all back. It was liberating to be able to serve God for free.

We need to ask ourselves: Am I going to live for possessions? Popularity? Am I going to be driven by pressures? Guilt? Bitterness? Materialism? Or am I going to be driven by God’s purposes (for my life)?

When I get up in the morning, I sit on the side of my bed and say, God, if I don’t get anything else done today, I want to know You more and love You better. God didn’t put me on earth just to fulfill a to-do list. He’s more interested in what I am than what I do. That’s why we’re called human beings, not human doings.

Happy moments, PRAISE GOD.
Difficult moments, SEEK GOD.
Quiet moments, WORSHIP GOD.
Painful moments, TRUST GOD.
Every moment, THANK GOD.

Thanks Jimmy for forwarding this to me…